"And then she be says."

I'm not sure if it is a result of living here or teaching kindergarten, but my english is going to shit. The title, TOTALLY said by yours truly. When I want to ask someone what time it might be, I often have to stop and think about how to ask it. "what time is it?" or "what time it is?" I used the later one in a joking manner all too often and now I forget which way I'm supposed to say it.

Well, Easter with the parentals was sufficient. After spending 5 hours driving around Memphis on a Thursday night (looking for Target that my GPS swore existed but didn't) and finally heading down to Beale Street by myself...the folks landed at 11:39 p.m. Minor problems with weather in Dallas, resulting in a missed flight, flight times changing, sitting on the runway...all leading up to their grand arrival in the DELTA, womp, womp, womp. On Friday, after touring Ruleville (it took 5 minutes), I put them to work...we hung curtain rods (curt & rod if you like puns like Bruce does), cleaned my fans, set up the fire ring, Jeannie slept, dad found all of the things wrong with my house and made a list for the landlord, baked some treats. SOS...I need someone to teach me how to make rice crispy treats...I'm a failure. 0/2. We went for crawdads and shrimp that night at a place called Crustaceans....they had a big ole crawdad painted on the side of the building, it was a ritzy establishment. Saturday and Sunday were spent in Jackson with Mike and Gretchen enjoying the gorgeous weather, egg bake, and mildly-intoxicated neighbors having an easter egg hunt for their kids the night before easter. Don't worry, I found 10 eggs that the kiddos missed (I MIGHT or might not have taken part in hiding them extra hard so they would be more of a "challenge"). It was a fun weekend and actually felt like a vacation.

We have LESS than one month of school left...omg. We are officially done on May 22, but that last week is going to be consumed with testing. A little bit nervous....I met with my program director the other day and in order for my kids to have advanced 1.5 years in reading, I need to push them these last couple of weeks and hopefully have each student moved up one reading level. TFA is all about data, sometimes it's good, sometimes it blows. Of course I want my kids reading well into a first grade level, but not at the expense of the lowest learners who need as much of my attention as I can make time for. We'll get close, I'll tell you that much.

Last week I got sent home from school. It was 7 a.m....I was wearing a dress with leggings under it. Apparently, you can't wear leggings to school. My principal said it was in the handbook, but someone else disagreed. Either way, an hour later I was walking back into my classroom in a new outfit. It was pretty hilarious but highly annoying at the same time. I wish I had my handbook here so I could verify if that were true or not. This week we had a meeting with our superintendent...it was the entire district crammed into a cafeteria in Sunflower. The moral of the meeting, "do not hit children." Well, like that was ever a prevalent message before. Let's say this, people have paddles, it's not uncommon. Some people go as far as to NAME their paddles. Some people have multiple paddles. Many people have paddles that have been broken. My kindergartners get into fights. They swear at each other. They use the finger sign (give the middle finger). People are yelling ALL.OF.THE.TIME. Welcome to my life in the delta.

Last weekend some of my friends and I ran a 5K in Cleveland, MS. All I have to say about our performance is that we weren't last. This weekend we grilled out last night and helped my friend get ready for the Ruleville prom tonight. We frosted 150 cookies, blew up 200 balloons, made the backdrop for pictures, you know, typical Friday night stuff. Tonight we're supposed to be having a bonfire but I realize that finding firewood around here is darn-near impossible. Although I think we have enough sticks and whatnot in our yard and abandoned shed to suffice for a couple of fires.

GUESS WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTT?!?!?! I'll be in Winona in 11 days!!! EEEEEKKKK! First I have to write a letter to the superintendent asking for Thursday and Friday off. If he doesn't give me those days off I will be calling in sick. Ridiculous. As of May 1st our two measly personal days are converted to sick days and no one can take personal days in May. Well...you better believe I'm taking two days and they can call them whatever they'd like. It's not like my kids are missing out in educational material. Friday is the annual May Day and from what I hear is a major cluster ****. They play games, eat snacks, there is another pageant, an assembly in which all classes do something for. Speaking of, the theme this year is China. What on EARTH can my kids do that is at all related to China. Usually they sing songs or something, I'm dumbfounded on what my class is going to do, I obvs. can't teach them anything in Chinese. Last year it was Africa and they sang "in the jungle." The May Day committee MIGHT be on crack this year. If you know of any songs or things they can do, PLEASE call me ASAP!!!

Okay...better get busy on grad school work....it's crunch time. Enjoy the weekend....even if it isn't 85 there ;)

y'all fixin' for some crawdads?

I think I can honestly say that it is becoming easier to use the word "y'all" I never thought I would admit this day came, but it has. Really. I'm sorry.

Anyway, thank you grandma black for the nice Easter card (and guilt trip for not positing a blog since March 16). Kidding...I keep thinking about things to say, but feel like my life is so mundane, yet annoying chaotic, I don't know what to even write?!

First of all....my trip to Hawaii was frickin' amazing. I know I ended the last post on Wednesday night. On Thursday, Ambjor and I went to Pearl Harbor, hung out in Waikiki, then I drove back to Waianae (I had Maggie's car while she was in school). Friday I went to school with Maggie for the morning, got to see her class and Brianne's class...it was crazy to see what Kindergarten is like in another state (quite possibly felt like another country). Makes me feel like Mississippi isn't as far behind as I thought...or isn't the only state in which public education is downright terrible. Her school had such a different atmosphere, I mean, yeah, it's in the middle of an island in the pacific ocean, how much better could it get? But really, it felt welcoming and friendly...not the hostile feeling I get walking into school each and everyday. I spent exactly two hours that afternoon on the beach and fried my shins....whoopsies. Hey, I got a WICKED tan out of the deal! That night we went to Waikiki and went out and then everyone met on Waikiki beach to spend my last day doing my favorite thing of life...laying on the beach reading Harry Potter. Okay, I was the only one reading, whatever. Our flight left at 9 p.m. that night...got to LA 5 hours later (but it was 5 a.m. their time). Slept on the floor at our gate until Cody woke me up saying we were boarding. Flew to Chicago, sat there for a couple of hours. Flew to Memphis, drove two hours home, went to bed. Was at school by 6:55 a.m. the next morning ready....or at least pretending to be. None of my students really commented on my tan although they all gave me a quizzical look...one student in another grade said, "mannn, all the white teachers came back orange."

Okay...school. I have been FREAKING out since break because we are in our last quarter. I feel like I have some kids that are so low...I don't want to retain THAT many...I don't know what to do to get them to where they need to be...ahhh! Grades were due right after break and report cards went out...so, I had several meetings with parents saying, "uh, unless they get it together and we practice EXTRA hard both at home and at school...I'll be seeing them again next year." It kind of makes me feel like a failure thinking I can't get these kids to where they need to be. However...today I had a meeting with my literacy coach...just me for once...and she basically told me that my kids are doing fine. I am pushing them plenty far this year, they are learning more than enough to adequately be ready for first grade, etc. I had some kids struggling with the word "important" in their books today...really all they need to be able to read are words like "made, bug, truck, gave." Holy hannah...we might get there. Because of a new goofy rule, all teachers have to stay after school until 4:00 now...so that gives me perfect opportunity to tutor one girl who is really on the fence...and hopefully I'll only be retaining two...fingers crossed.

Big weekend coming up. If you only understand how much I like egg bake.... ;) Kidding...the parentals are coming. We're going to get dinner on Beale Street in Memphis, tour Ruleville (that'll last 5 minutes), eat crawdads, spend Easter with Mike and Gretchen in Jackson, fix my car:), hang some curtains, you know all of that fun stuff! They have no idea what they're in for in the middle of frickin' no wheresville!

AH....let me tell you about my day yesterday....it was 9:30...I went to use the sketchy teacher bathroom/closet. I walk in, turn on the light, instantly turn around flipping out because there are two cockroaches on the wall. GROSS. I ran into the janitor in the hall who knows how much I love cockroaches. They were laughing at me. Anyway, I used the kids bathroom which is equally as scary. As I walked past the cafeteria I noticed that there was a strange smell coming from that direction of the school but didn't think much of it. About 20 minutes later, the lead teacher who was in charge because my principal was out of town came in. She tells me we are evacuating the building. To get the children's coats on, bring work, get out the back door and head to the counselor's room. WTF, this is not a joke, right? We spent an hour in the counselor's room watching Peter Pan (it was my planning period, I'm allowed to show movies). Turns out...the maintenance people were annoyed with the sewage smell coming from the janitor's closet. So, first they poured bleach down it. That didn't suffice. Then they poured liquid acid. Thus resulting in an acid cloud INSIDE the janitor's closet. The man who did it definitely inhaled it as well. Once word got out what the smell was, we had to evacuate. Smartie-pants maintenance worker didn't think it would be a problem for children to be inhaling these fumes. He was told to get himself to the hospital and get checked out. Oh the things that happen at JCRE. By lunch the smell was gone and the school was freezing, all of the windows and doors had been open to get the smell out and it was about 49 degrees yesterday.

Last tidbit....the new superintendent of my school district just started in January and has been changing things up ever since. The latest rumor is that both principals and teachers may be moved from school to school. Therefore, we'll sign a contract with the district, but are not guaranteed our same school if they decide to change something. Some people are freaking out. I'm not...I'll worry once I actually see something happen. Plus, I'm a short-term teacher...what's the purpose of moving me knowing I will not be here forever.

SHOUT OUTS....yay to Cassie for not getting lost in New York. Go feed the pigeons in central park like Kevin in Home Alone! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to aunt Jackie for the box of books...we've already read most of them since getting the package!! Happy Belated birthday to Grandma Davis and Ingrid.

.....PS, this is the week I'm supposed to be on spring break in Florida with the crew :( Miss you, all!

Irish Hawaiians in Chinatown

OMG, I love being a teacher...wait, I mean I love the perks of having a week off for spring break!! We made it to Hawaii on Sunday after 17.5 hours of traveling. We had to get up at 1:30 a.m. to drive to Memphis to catch our flight...however, it was 2:30 p.m. and sunny when we arrived in Honolulu. Basically, I love this place...I love that fact that I am seeing the REAL Hawaii staying with my friend versus being in a resort or hotel. Mind you...this post will ONLY be about my vacay, and mostly just so I can remember what I did each day...if you know me at all you'll know I'm mildly loosing my mind this year ;)

Sunday: picked up at the airport...went straight to pick up one of Maggie's friend and then down to Waikiki. We did some shopping, had a couple of lava flow drinks at a pink hotel on the beach and ate puka dogs (the greatest/strangest fashion of making a hotdog but so wonderful). The best part? It was the Honolulu Festival and I SAW A PARADE. Love.it! After a long day downtown and other random errands, I showered and was in bed around 10...25 hours after I got up (with the time change it was 3 a.m. in MN).

Monday: woke up bright and early at 7 a.m. Hawaii time (noon in Minnesota). Maggie was at school...so went for a jog (and heard goats in the mountain I was running along), checked out the pools at her apartment complex, ate some breakfast and plopped my butt on the beach a mile down the road for 3+ hours. I came back, took a dip in the pool and had a sun-successful first day in Hawaii! Maggie took me to a little cove in her town that is notorious for having sea turtles. It didn't disappoint, there were 3 HUGE sea turtles just hanging out on shore. You can get as close as you want (without touching them--it's illegal, they are protected by Hawaiian law) and they don't even move. Then we went for a hike on the very west-edge of the island almost to Mokuleia. We saw whales within 10 minutes of our hike. We also found one lone seal trying to maneuver through the rocks, he was sooo cute. A little further down, we saw more whales just having a DAY. They were flapping their tails over and over and we even watched one jump half way out of the water and splash himself down sideways. You DON'T get this in Ruleville. WOW! To end the day, Maggie and I went to Ko Olina resort (the place where pro bowl football players stay...wicked amazing) and went hot tubing and swimming...sssshhhh, no one knew we weren't staying there!

Tuesday: Maggie took the day off so we headed across the island to Kailua, particularly the BEAUTIFUL beach called Lanikai. My friend Ambjor is also in Hawaii this week and she "attempted" figuring out the bus system and after a couple of tries, got on a bus to meet us in Kailua. Thank goodness for the GPS on her blackberry, which told her when she should get off! The drive to the east edge of the island was INCREDIBLE. The mountains are jagged and the jungle covers EVERYTHING. Besides the road, there is no sign of human life within the greenery. We spent the day on a WICKED gorgeous beach with white sand, clear blue water, and many asian tourists. Although it was semi-overcast we got plenty of sun! Don't worry Grandma, Maggie is a nag about making sure we all wear sunscreen! Then we headed into "town" (Honolulu) and met Ambjor's friend Beth who we stayed with. We got ready, made dinner, had some drinks and headed down for a St. Patty's Day block party a couple of blocks away. I can now cross off: partying on St. Patrick's Day in Chinatown with a bunch of Irish Hawaiians from my to-do list of life. It was pure madness and LOTS of people (even met up with Tony Roeloffs briefly!). Lucky for us, we were late getting down there and the block party cleared out at 10. We were able to hang out with Cody (also from the Delta) and his friends for a bit before crashing like old/lame people. Saw some "interesting" people on our walk back to the hotel though!

Wednesday: Today we took our time getting up (go fig) and finally made our way toward the North Shore to be beached for the day. The North Shore is where professional surfing competitions are held, Lost is filmed, wealth ensues, you know...we went to a GREAT beach and parked it for 4 hours. My friend Brianne from summer institute also took the day off and we had a great girls-day at Waialua. It was also my first experience with shave ice...holy amazing. Although we each got smalls, I'd be a little nervous to see what a large might be! Tonight, our crispy-selves ate dinner in a COLD restaurant in Beth's building and are laying low for the rest of the night. Those teacher-folk headed back to Waianae because they are actually teaching tomorrow ;)

Now I'm caught up, phew. I'm sure you're bored, but it's good for me to remember what we actually did. The scenery is A-MAZING and changes drastically as you cross to different parts of the island. The traffic is mildly out of control...too many people in a little space will do that. I'm staying with Ambjor and Beth again tonight and tomorrow we're headed to Pearl Harbor, Waikiki and some shopping. AHHHH, I LOVE it here...so natural and full of culture. About to pass out down with sun burnt eyelids....

Aloha.

"Spring Break" = 3 blends...what are they?

So, I was thinking that I should write up some notes of things I wanted to post...but of course I didn't do that because that would have made sense.

Anyway, THANK.GOODNESS.FOR.SPRING.BREAK. When I thought I couldn't yell any louder, well, then I went to school this week and lord knows it was the loudest week yet. Apparently it's all down hill from here. The weeks leading up to spring break are known for being dreadful. Then by the time you get back it's warming up outside, then it's nearing the end of the school year...oh.mah.gosh. The other day I was walking down the hallway at school and I kind of laughed to myself thinking, "oh.cripes, I am a teacher." I know, I know, it has set in earlier, but for some reason I still think it's kind of funny that I am capable of teaching 24 children. I have to admit, it is amazing to watch my kids learn how to read. The more blends we know, the more doors that are opened to being able to read. We learned 'er' in the last two weeks and some of my top kids are totally reading words like "sister" "brother" "grandfather" it's incredible. Then I have kids that just totally make up words that are NOT on the page. ahhhh...I wish I knew how to differentiate.


Last Monday we celebrated Dr. Seuss' birthday. I painted my kid's faces with whiskers and a white dot on their nose to look like cat and the hat. It was wicked cute until they all picked it off. We also wore pictures of shirts that gave us a new name, since Dr. Seuss is so good at making up words that rhyme with things we know. Wocket in my Pocket is one of my favorite books, so each of my kids were things like vug under the rug, Zelf upon the shelf, etc. Plus, that was the first day that I had an alternative spring break'er in my room. He was there from a college in Texas and helped us that week....it was crazy because my kids LITERALLY thought they were invincible because he was in there. UGH.....they.were.so.bad.

My problem child has been much less of a problem lately. Although on Tuesday, he gave my assistant SOOOO much grief, throwing pencils, raging around the room, disturbing EVERYONE in their centers, etc...that she went over to his one-of-a-kind marble jar and took a whole HANDFUL of marbles and put them in the sad jar. Normally he gets one at a time and I don't think he's had more than 5 a day all year...haha, that day he had half the cup full. Don't worry, he was kicked out of the classroom twice and finally sent home from school after punching and kicking me in the hallway. Don't feel bad for me, I asked for it...I heard him sitting outside of the office playing with another kid so I went down there and got in his face. Hey, if you're sitting outside of the office waiting for the principal to come back so she can send you home, you had better NOT be playing with the other naughty kid who is going home for a three day suspension vacay. My principal and a few others in the school think I have a wealth of patience, little do they know that my patience is on the shortest string I've got...they are fooled.

Today, the day before spring break...we spent the afternoon having an activity/health fair type of thing. We went to different rooms and did exercises, tried healthy foods, etc. Let me tell you, the healthy foods we tried were a cup of ranch with a piece of carrot in it and another cup with raspberries and blueberries. Then, 1/2 hour later we got to use our tickets to go buy hot cheetos, fruit snacks, juice, nachos, fruit rollups, etc. The kids could bring $2 for snacks, which equals FOUR snacks. OMG...what a joke. Oh well...we survived the hectic afternoon in a more mild manner than previous days. During the first 15 minutes I was supposed to be teaching a health lesson that was handed to me at the start of that lesson...well, I skimmed the page, we talked about fruit, exercise, drinking water and tumbling. I don't know why tumbling was on this sheet, but whatever. I showed the kids how to do a somersault and they FLIPPED out. I didn't know if my feet would go over my head the way they were supposed to, but they did!

Today was also the first day I have ever watched a kid get "paddled" in the office. One of my students got her clip moved from blue to green for not following directions in the hallway, this is surprising in itself because she usually spends the entire day hanging out on red (TERRIBLE). But, yesterday and today she has talked back when I moved her clip. Both days I sent her into the room by herself to put her head down while we were in the hallway finishing our bathroom break. BOTH days she went in the room and screamed bloody murder. Literally, you would have thought someone was whooping her right there. Today, it was absurd (my kids love that work). I went in the room, took her arm and led her down the hall, which of course made the screaming worse but whatever...I'm not dealing with crap like that from a child who already spends the majority of the day talking back to me. If you're going to add screaming to that, I'm done. She got three "licks" from the paddle and my principal made her apologize to me and we left. I'm not sure how to feel about it. She needed it...but then again, she could have gone back to the office 2 more times that afternoon for just being such a punk that I want to scream. Her mouth drives me nuts AND her and her twin have the nerve to talk back to kids in 4th and 5th grade. Little do they know, one of these days one of those older kids will backhand them and they'll learn. My kids' parents tell their kids, 'if someone hits you, you hit them back.' It's such a great parenting strategy, I can't even get over it.

Okay, getting long winded....today marks the end of our 3rd quarter...holy bologna, one more quarter to get these kids ready for first grade....eeeek. We did master addition and subtraction in the last month though, that makes me feel better! Anyway...it's Friday night...I'm 30+ hours away from my flight to HAWAII!!! SOOOO....FREAKING....EXCITED. Spending the week on the beach and getting a wicked tan and I will come back the happiest kindergarten teacher alive! The only downside...we have to get up at 2 a.m. on Sunday morning to make it to Memphis to catch our 6 a.m. flight! I'm staying up LATE tonight so I can fall asleep tomorrow at 9 p.m.!! Random fact of the day...I learned that I have enough space (and ceiling height) to complete a full golf swing in my bedroom...now I just need a rug so I don't scrape up the brick floor!

Miss you all...but not the ice storms you're getting up there! Last week was 70 and even 83 one day. This week has been 30-40 and rainy...blah...ALOHA!

Immune system overload...

Well, add another one to the tally....so far, I've gotten strep throat, bronchitis and the flu from my rambunctious class of 24. BLAH. Who is 25 years old and gets the flu? In fact, I can't remember the last time I threw up (that wasn't alcohol induced). It's my own fault though. In fact, it's a tell-tale sign that karma is biting me in the butt. Yesterday I complained to TWO people how I wish I could have had a 1/2 day snowday (like some of my MN friends) and that I was disappointed that it's almost March and we didn't get a snow day at all. Down here, at the sign of snow life literally shuts down. I would have LOVED to spend the day in sweats

and watch Regis and Kelly. Well...I'm in sweats but couldn't get out of bed this morning for fear of what happens when I sit up.

Anyway, not only am I taking a sick day, but I'm in the midst of a mild flood hitting Ruleville, in particular, our yard that is no longer visible. Don't worry, my car is parked in the back yard and will probably not be able to be moved all weekend. Anyway, it started thunderstorming at 4:15 this morning (I was awake) and hasn't stopped. The last picture you can see partially remnants of our driveway and how it leads into complete submersion. The first picture, you can see what happens when people drive by....the deepest part is definitely at the end of our driveway. I can't even go get the mail. Lois isn't going to be able to get TO the house unless she has rainboots on....oh cripes, what a day.

Blogger is annoying me with these pictures, they keep moving. Anyway, now that I'm confined to the couch, at least I uploaded pictures. I'll put some from the sweetheart pageant on that post...check it out and see how frickin' cute my kids are!!

Monday we are celebrating Dr. Seuss' birthday...we get to dress "wacky" or Dr. Seuss wacky, while still wearing our uniforms of course. I've got some ideas, let's hope they turn out. Stupid flu has ruined my travel plans of going to Target (and Mike and Gretchen's this weekend) :( Next year, I MIGHT consider getting a flu shot. Ha, I say that now. Maybe while I'm there I should finally update my tetanus shot since that has lapsed at least 4 years...

None the less, a 3 day weekend. I'll get over it. Happy Birthday, AMBJOR!!!

evacuate the bus for a tornado drill?

So....in an effort to appease people and not wait MONTHS in between posts, I am trying to write on a more consistent basis. Well...and because I kind of have a funny story today...

First off, I am losing my voice. Not sure why, it's just leaving me momentarily....anywho, today I decided that since my kids were being their typical, terrible self...I was going to FORCE them to listen to me and not by yelling. I whispered during the first 15 minutes of math meeting...it worked pretty well although who would have thought that it kind of strains your voice to try to whisper loudly for that long. Anyway, it was a change of pace and sort of fun, until they made me mad enough that I was forced to yell. One kid was falling asleep on the rug, so I made him go sit in a chair. He got up and threw a temper tantrum, literally stomping and screaming to the back of the rug. He's a crier anyway, but still....that went on for 10 painful and annoying minutes.

My kids are sometimes worse than ever...they give each other the middle finger ("gave the finger sign" they call it) they kick one another, they pinch, they hit, they are soooo mean to each other. All of this is a result of my classroom environment and not enough empathy for things like that....ugh...if I could do it all over again...

Anywho...in case you were wondering what went down last Friday during the Sweetheart Pageant...have no fear, the results are in.....KB (my class) WON the lower grade king and queen honors!! WHOOP, WHOOP. Although I was excited for them, the whole situation was mildly redic. The winners were based on the king and queen who could raise the most money for their class. They could sell snacks in our room during school (instead of buying school snacks) or sell raffle tickets for a Wal-Mart gift card or just get donations. Well, as of Thursday night we had like $75. Then, by 8 a.m. Friday morning there was more than $900 being counted on my teacher table. I was not a fan.....a.) I spent a half hour counting and recounting money.... b.)the whole competition brings out the WORST in people, although the parents I had were not obsessively competitive. They had their money turned in and they were done, thank goodness. c.) I cannot get parents to send another box of kleenex to school, where did ALL of this money come from???? Anyway, there was a big 'ole pageant in the afternoon (in fact, we ate lunch before 11 a.m. to get ready for this shin-dig) where these kids wore white formal dresses or a tux shirt and black pants. I have a couple of pictures...they are still on my camera. It was absurd.
Yesterday, in the middle of math...the secretary came over my intercom saying to line my kids up by the door for a bus/tornado drill. I had no idea what this meant...if it's a tornado drill we move to the hallway, but if it's a bus drill we are outside? Anyway...turns out we practiced what to do if you are ON the bus and a tornado is coming. So...without explaining ANYTHING to a busload of kindergartners...they open the back door to let them jump out where my principal and I are. We are semi-helping them jump out. And by 'semi' I mean, some of them left their toes on the edge of the bus and fell face first toward the ground. Again, no one told these kids to put their arms out and we could grab their one hand and under their armpit. So, it's a little scary and mildly funny when some of them put all of their trust into two people who are not 100% ready for them to jump. But...then one of my newest students (new as in November) gets to the back...mind you she is a twin and her nickname is "big mama." She is bigger than the other twin and is a bit larger in size, but she HATES when anyone uses the word 'fat' even to describe an animal. I feel bad for her, except when she spends all day running her mouth, then I don't have any sympathy for her. However, today she gets to the back of the bus and literally steps OUT of the bus towards me...completely expecting me to catch all 84 pounds of her. OMG...I caught her, well, I caught her from hitting the pavement. It wasn't a graceful landing, but at least she didn't faceplant into the ground. Because of this, the other kindergarten teacher and I are laughing HYSTERICALLY. In fact, I was laughing and crying so hard, that I could no longer help kids off the bus and was replaced. After the drill, someone came and pulled four of my kids to take pictures of them practicing this. She was at the end of the line and one they had pulled. I was like, "uh, this one's going to jump on you instead of just jumping down." Needless to say they picked another student. If you call me right now to retell the story, I will laugh until I cry...so.flippin.funny. I wish it had been on video so you could accurately see how hilarious this looked!

Moral of the story, the kids jumped off the back of the bus and went running into the school and crouched down in the hallway as if there was a tornado. I didn't get it either, but whatev. We have had 4 tornado drill practices and 1 fire drill practice...interesting.

Last story (cripes how did this get so long???)...I went down to New Orleans on Sunday morning to meet up with the SOUL group. Somehow, I made it by myself from Mike and Gretchen's house in Jackson to the French Quarter without getting lost. AND...I spent the entire day in the french quarter and my car didn't get towed OR broken into! I'd say it was a successful day!! Monday was spent painting the outside of a house in what we were told was the worst neighborhood in the nation. Catholic Charities didn't tell us that when they sent us there, but the military police that stopped later in the afternoon told us otherwise. They said we would be fine as long as we were in a group and out before dark. If that doesn't freak you out....we were safe though...and we had a good time working. I wish I could have stayed all week, it is definitely an area that can not and will not have too many volunteers. Many homes still have remains of spray paint on their doors. It's a crazy, interesting, overwhelming place...and hopefully someday I'll be back there.

PS....got another new student this week. Well, he is not brand-new. He started in my class in August, the moved to Texas and now they moved back. Current total is 24. My usual talked-about troublemaker was suspended for today and tomorrow. He came storming in from recess ahead of us and refused to open the door for me when we tried coming in (literally I was locked out of the school) and stuck his tongue out saying, "nah na-na, na-na, nah." My principal is fed up with his actions and his momma not thinking he needs to go back to the behavior center for more help. Therefore, she sends him on vacations and will continue to do so until she has enough documentation to show that he is not able to get an education because of his actions and get him back in to the treatment center.

And...now that I've wasted all of my time and yours, peace out, girl scout.

Mail order BB gun?

You know it's bad when Erik Stonestrom has posted-me-up....aka, he's posted twice since my last, what is the world coming to?

Okay...here goes nothing...

I woke up on Saturday morning READY to write a blog, I was SOOO annoyed. Then I refrained because I know I shouldn't only write when I'm angry because then I sound like a raging drama queen, as I sometimes am. But...I woke up AT LEAST 5 times during the night due to cat(s) outside of my bedroom shrieking. Not just like a little cat cry like "feeed me" but a wail. All I could thinking about in my delusional state each time I awoke was, I wish I had a BB gun, I would shoot every last one of them. Then I woke up again wondering if it was legal to send a BB gun through the mail. Mail order BB gun, that was my solution. Come on, it was like 3 a.m....I was not thinking straight (because obviously if I was, I would have realized I could just go buy one). Anyway, thanks to the stupid animals I was up by 8 a.m. and OVERLY productive for me on a Saturday morning. Later in the day I saw the culprit outside of my window still bellowing away. I tried to chase it but it would run a few feet and keep screaming. Grandma's "scat cat" method worked to no avail. However, I have to add that after seeing the cat, I could not shoot it even if I wanted to....which is a good thing because if you know me, I love cats!

Oh...how is school?...blah. It's fine. My kids have been really stinking naughty lately, which is another reason I don't care to write. They are SO.MEAN. They hit, pinch, kick, push, EVERYTHING ALL OF THE TIME. I watched a really great professional development video about how you have to "win them over, not win over them." It's so true. The idea of not smiling until Christmas is disproved in this video as well, good thing, I hated that idea. I'm slowly trying to win my students over because once that happens, I will have MUCH FEWER behavioral issues. I hope it happens with most students before May. We have been doing a good job during our morning read aloud, we are learning about dinosaurs (which has been SO much fun, in a nerdy-kindergarten way!) and I even bought the Land Before Time (partially because I love it so much) to watch on Mondays. They really like it; as Petry would say, "yep, yep, yep!"

My repeater is not.my.favorite.any.longer. I'm at witts end with him most days, especially as of late. He's back to being sent home frequently. He threw a pencil at another student the other day but ended up hitting my assistant in the face. It wasn't hard, but it was enough to get you a one-way ticket home. He creates such a stir amongst the rest of my room that life seems impossible some days. They get so wild when he is there doing whatever his heart desires. He was suspended one day last week and absent another day and it made my life so.much.easier. I enjoyed my classroom so much more and I didn't feel so angry when the kids left. Obviously I let one student get to me, but I've exhausted every possible solution to curing this problem. If behavior continues, he will be sent back to the facility for a longer period of time, his momma was told that this morning when we met. Now she calls my cell phone multiple times a day to check on him. Today he brought a working cell phone to school...then threw a fit when I took it...

Apparently we don't have any valentine's day parties because 'we don't have time.' Wondering how that works? Well...we have a Sweetheart Pageant on Friday afternoon which encompasses our "free time." Last week we had to pick a boy and a girl from our class to be our king/queen. My assistant had briefed me in this. Basically, you pick the kids whose parents will raise the most money. No joke. The king/queen are responsible for bringing in "healthy" snacks for kids in our class to purchase. This is not unusual as the kids can buy "healthy" snacks each day from the school. And by healthy I mean hot cheetos, doritos, fruit snacks and juice. It's a gong show. So, the kids can buy these snacks in our room. All kids in the class are responsible for selling tickets for a Wal-Mart gift card. They can sell as many/few as they want. That money is also going into our class totals. On Friday, all money needs to be turned in (because it is obviously being kept in the classroom for the duration of the week--another wise choice) and is counted prior to the pageant. That afternoon the kings and queens come walking in dressed to the nines. Girls wear white dresses, white shoes, white tights. Boys are dressed for prom as well. The class that raises the most money, their king and queen is crowned. Vanna, what do they win? Well Bob, let me tell you. They win not only bragging rights for an entire year, but a 12'' trophy. I'll let you know how we do....I hope you're on pins and needles awaiting the results....

I'm going to NOLA (New Orleans, LA) this weekend!! Saint Mary's is on February break and I'm going to meet up with the group headed there for their mission trip. I'm super excited, especially because we have Monday (President's Day) off of school.

I'd better get some work done...progress reports have to go out on Tuesday and I have lesson plans to write for next week. I don't want to feel guilty for leaving for the weekend and not getting things done! Shout outs: Happy 30th birthday to my cousin Rachel!!! Keep cutie-pie Kylie in your prayers again....she has more restrictions to her already restrictive diet. Kayla, my friend Sara has LOADS of wheat-free recipes and cookbooks...she could hook you up! Thank you Grandpa Davis for doing my taxes (pray that I don't have to pay in!!) and thank you Grandma Black for finally going to the doctor!! Safe travels to Cassie as she leads her mission trip to...da, da, da-da...Southhhh Dakotaaaaa.